Regrets and Nosebleeds
by piratequeennerd
Summary: Ivankov turns up on the Thousand Sunny at a very bad time for Sanji. Sanji tries to run away but ends up confronting something that has been bothering him for while. Meanwhile Zoro has a very unexpected reaction to something that Ivankov brings. Eventual Zosan (yaoi-boyxboy) but nothing to heavy.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own anything to do with One Piece. Enjoy

…..

After a run in with some marines, relative calm had settled over the Thousand Sunny. The sun was shining and it was a beautiful spring afternoon. There was a slight breeze and you could see fish swimming near by. It was a very relaxing atmosphere but the crew was still on edge as they were still finding their footing in the New World. They waited anxiously for something to pop up because they hadn't had an afternoon this peaceful in a while. It just wasn't normal for them. Luffy, Usopp and Chopper were playing on deck and fishing while listening to one of Usopp's stories, Zoro was training in the crows nest/gym while keeping look out, Franky was tinkering in his weapon development room, Brook was playing some tunes on his violin while occasionally peeking at Robin and Nami who were sunbathing in their bikinis (yohoho) while Sanji was in the kitchen preparing some special drinks for the lovely ladies.

Sanji twirled around before putting some mint on top of two superb drinks as the final touch. The drinks looked good and he had gone overboard so there were some standard quality drinks ready for the guys as well, well they couldn't really be called standard quality since he had trained with Ivankov and those Okamas. Thanks to them his skills had dramatically improved. He took a sip of his own drink to make sure the different flavours worked together perfectly and while he let the flavours dance over his tongue he thought back to his time in hell.

Okama hell wasn't as bad as he thought it would be. He was still traumatised and the thought of those okamas made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end but despite it all he had come on good terms with the king/queen of the place Ivankov. He was so relieved when he left and got to meet up with Luffy and the crew again but he hadn't really thought about missing those shitty okamas. Despite their terrifying appearance and their constant battle of trying to get him into a dress they were still nice guys. He didn't need to miss them though, he knew he would probably meet up with Ivankov again since Ivankov had made friends with Luffy and Luffy had connections with the revolutionaries. Sanji laughed as he remembered waking up on Okama Island the first time and thinking that a dainty lady had rescued him, oh how he was wrong. Who knows maybe he would've accepted one of those guys affections if they grew some manners and weren't always wearing dresses and pretending they were girls- wait what!? Sanji choked on his drink as he realised what direction his thoughts had headed. He sat himself down and lit up a much needed cigarette. He just needed to think things through and the familiar scent of tobacco always seemed to calm him down.

Sanji was not gay. Sanji was a ladies man. He knew he was an idiot who loved the idea of looking after someone delicate and feminine but it shouldn't really matter right? He couldn't always be the tough one in the relationship. If it was love it was love and he loved the way Robin conducted herself mysteriously and the way Nami took charge and ordered the crew around. That was all that needed to matter. Nami and Robin were strong and loyal, not delicate like the rich women who used to visit the Baratie but that didn't matter, those were good qualities. Sanji decided then and there that a good partner would have to be strong, determined and loyal which is exactly what Nami and Robin were. They also happened to be the major qualities of a shit for brains marimo swordsman. Sanji had quite possibly caught himself looking at Zoro's ass a few times in the past but that didn't mean anything. Ok. Maybe he had been looking at Zoro differently; especially since the moron had pretty much sacrificed himself back on Thriller Bark and he had wanted to do anything to trade places with him but that didn't mean- wait what!? Why was he thinking about Zoro now of all people? Thinking things through turned out to be pretty tiring and he could already feel a head ache coming on. Sighing, Sanji stood up with the tray of drinks and walked out the door onto the deck.

"Ah, Robin-chan, don't you look lovely today. With me I have brought this drink made with the upmost amount of care just for you" Sanji handed the drink over to Robin, this was what he was comfortable with. He loved serving the beautiful girls on the crew. "Thankyou Cook-san" Robin had replied. Sanji was about to leap off to give Nami her drink when Zoro's voice suddenly boomed over the loud speaker, "Hey guys, there's this huge ship coming towards us". Placing the drink down Sanji glared at the approaching ship, who dared to ruin this lovely afternoon for them? Franky had made his way up to the deck and everybody was on high alert. The ship didn't look like a marine ship but they were in the New World, they had to be prepared for the strongest enemies out there.

"Oi, everyone, there's a creepy guy with a crown and purple hair on that ship. He's waving at us." Usopp said, his nerves seeping into his voice.

"Really?! Let me see!" Luffy exclaimed while knocking Usopp over and grabbing his pair of binoculars. "Oh it's Iva-chan!"

"Iva-chan?" Sanji repeated. Why did that sound familiar?- oh shit. Purple hair and a crown!?

"Do you mean Ivankov?" Sanji asked, hoping that there were many people called Iva who had purple hair and thought that they were royalty.

"Yeah! Do you know him?" Luffy replied. Sanji paled and let his cigarette drop out of his mouth while Robin let out a small giggle. Everyone turned to Robin with questioning looks, "Ivankov?" Franky asked.

"He's a revolutionary who works with Luffy's father" Robin explained.

"He also saved my life when I almost died from poison. Shishishshishi" Luffy added receiving a hit to the head when Usopp retaliated and said "That shouldn't be funny!"

Sanji looked around. This wasn't good. He wasn't ready to face Ivankov yet, especially not in front of the crew. What if Ivankov told them about how he was converted into an Okama when he should've been helping Luffy? His honor couldn't afford that and the marimo would never let him forget about it. He needed to get out of there right now or he was toast.

"Luffy" He said while putting a hand on the captain's shoulder. "It has been a pleasure serving as your cook on your quest to find One Piece. I've had a really good time with you guys" he said before shouting out "Sky Walk!" and running through mid air aiming towards the horizon. He ran without thinking about where he was going. There had to be land somewhere near right?

"WHAAAAAAAAAAT!?" The crew shouted after a moments silence where everyone had digested what Sanji had just said. A few of the crew members actually fell over at Sanji's sudden outburst.

"SANJI WHERE ARE YOU GOING? COME BACK!" Luffy shouted while extending his arms out and pulling Sanji back to the ship. "You can't leave your crew without an explanation and you agreed to be this crew's cook! Whose food am I going to eat if you're gone?"

"Sorry you're right, Luffy" Sanji replied before adding "I'm not leaving the crew but… let me hide in the kitchen!" Sanji said before jumping up, running into the kitchen and slamming the door.

"Is Sanji-kun okay?" Nami asked nervously.

"Hmm… That was definitely not normal behaviour for him" Brook said.

"Tch, don't worry about the dramatic sissy cook" Zoro said.

"Zoro, are we going to be ok? I've never seen Sanji scared of anybody before" Chopper said.

"I'm not scared of that crappy king!" Sanji jumped out from behind the door yelling before running back inside again.

The crew looked at the door suspiciously before jumping when they heard another voice "Long time no see Mugiwara-boy! Don't tell me you've forgotten my beautiful face"

"Iva-chan!" Luffy exclaimed happily before jumping up and hugging the new presence that had appeared on the ship.

Zoro made a gulping sound when he saw Ivankov. "Why does Luffy always make friends with the weird ones" Zoro muttered under his breath. This guy was weird, wearing a leotard that barely covered him accompanied by fishnet stockings and high heeled boots. He had thought the cross dresser from Whiskey Peak and the ballerina from Baroque Works had been weird but this was on a totally different level.

"Who might you be green hair- boy?" Ivankov asked.

"You can't just come onto our boat and ask who I am!" Zoro yelled back.

"Iva-chan! It's so good to see you again! I didn't really have anytime to thank you properly back then for saving Bon-chan and I. Do you want to stay for a while? Sanji can prepare us a feast!" Luffy interrupted before Zoro chopped Ivankov up.

"Ivankov saved you?" Usopp asked.

"Bon-chan?" Zoro asked.

"Is Sanji really going to be able to cook a feast? He seemed a little off before" Chopper asked.

"That creep is staying for a while!?" Nami practically cried.

"I wouldn't mind a feast" Brook added when Franky started dancing.

"Fufufufu" was all Robin contributed to the rising chaos out on the deck.

The crew continued their antics which Ivankov ignored and looked at Luffy "Thank you for the offer Mugiwara- boy but I'm here for strictly business purposes only. We heard that you guys were in the area and I have come to deliver a message to you and Robin-girl, but setting that aside where is Sanji-chan? I was beginning to think that he was lying about being on your crew after all"

"I thought you were here for business only!" Usopp and Zoro snapped before Zoro added "Chan?"

"Yeah, Iva-chan, Sanji started acting weirdly when he saw you coming and now he's hiding in the kitchen" Luffy said.

"Well he can suit himself I guess, though I did bring a present for him" Ivankov said.

"A present! Is it food?" Luffy asked while drooling.

"No, it's not food. I got this for Sanji because I know what he really wants. You see I spent the past 2 years with him and-"

"Didn't Sanji say he was in hell for the past two years?" Usopp said

"- there was something that was bothering him the whole time. When he first arrived I'm told he fitted in perfectly with the other Okamas, after a bit of persusion that is-"

"Persuasion!?" Chopper squeaked, everybody continued listening to the story with mildly horrified expressions except for Luffy and Zoro who looked amused.

"-but when I arrived all he wanted was to get off the island. He insisted that he was part of your crew but only admitted to his wanted poster after coughing up blood. Of course he calmed down after he got some sort of message in the newspaper and he agreed to stick around for two years so he could get stronger but I've never forgotten the look on his face when he admitted his wanted poster. That is why the others and I decided to take a picture of him in action and send it to the marines so they could update his wanted poster." Ivankov explained. The others were instantly grinning, they knew Sanji hated his bounty picture; he was the only guy who hadn't hung his poster up in the boys cabin yet.

"Sanji would really appreciate that. That's an amazing idea" Usopp said. Chopper and Zoro nodded.

"It's not just an idea, we did it. We sent a letter to the marines pretending to be worried civilians that thought he looked nothing like his bounty picture and that it was dangerous for him not to be identified properly. The marines obviously agreed because these wanted posters are all over the world and right now in my hand I have a copy of it." Ivankov said happily, trying to add a bit of drama before he revealed the poster.

"Oi! Give it here you tranny king" Sanji said running over to Ivankov, he had been eavesdropping on their conversation from the kitchen and couldn't contain his excitement.

"Good to see you too Sanji-chan" Ivankov said.

"Ah so you came out Mr. Nosebleed" Zoro smirked, so Sanji had been scared after all.

"What did you call me Marimo!?" Sanji replied turning away from Ivankov to attack Zoro. The usual insults occurred followed by a flurry or kicks and swords.

"So is that Sanji-boy's boyfriend? No wonder Sanji was so guarded back at Okama Island. He could have told us that he was already taken."

"No! Where did you get that idea!? Zoro replied spinning around to face Ivankov while Sanji stiffened and the rest of the Straw hats looked up at Ivankov like he had just said the most intelligent thing ever and had answered all the mysteries of the world.

"Well anyway here's the poster!" Ivankov said unrolling the poster which was followed by several gasps. Sanji stayed facing the wall, behind him was his chance at redemption. No longer would the ladies of the world laugh at him, they would chase him, begging him for some of his time. They would want autographs and would turn into screaming fan girls every time he said something. He started to turn around to look at his future, his past, the picture that would go down in history with the name "Blackleg" written under it when something totally unexpected happened. Zoro who was looking at the picture went red in the face and suddenly flew backwards leaving a trail of blood that most definitely came from his nose. What was with that reaction! Was the picture so amazing that it even left Zoro stunned and _excited_? There was no way. He couldn't believe it, he was so excited that he jumped around and looked at the picture. It was… It was… It was.

….

Sanji had been standing frozen for an hour. Chopper had diagnosed it as some sort of shock and said that Sanji would recover whenever he felt ready. Still the crew tried to wake him up anyway but no matter what the crew members did they couldn't snap Sanji out of his shocked state.

Usopp had even whispered "A beautiful women came and she's in your kitchen" into Sanji's ear.

In the end Chopper had changed into heavy point and carried Sanji into the kitchen and dining area. Luffy had wondered out loud if Hancock was hiding somewhere and had turned him into a statue but he wasn't stone, his heart was still beating, Sanji just wasn't responding to anything. Robin had given Ivankov coffee and he had given her a vivre card telling her that even though her two years were up they could still use her assistance if she ever felt like dropping by and if Luffy wanted to meet his father they would be allowed to bring the whole crew. It wasn't until Ivankov had said his goodbyes and left that Sanji started moving again. He let out a puff of smoke and leant against the fridge. The poster, it had revealed everything. It was him, holding a pair of heels with horrible makeup covering his face, blonde curly extensions framing his face horribly, a cigarette hanging out of his mouth, painted nails and the worse part, he was wearing a dress. A freakin dress. Suddenly Sanji burst into flames. "What kind of present was that!?" He shouted before trying to escape out the door to kill Ivankov. The straw hat crew jumped up and restrained Sanji, expecting that kind of reaction. Zoro, Luffy and Chopper held Sanji against the wall when Luffy said "Don't kill Ivankov, he meant no harm plus he said when I visit my father he'll feed me lots of meat!"

Sanji looked at Luffy, the captain that was feared by the world, the dangerous man with a four hundred million belli bounty but all Sanji could see was the innocent and happy teenager.

"I'm sorry" Sanji said tears beginning to form in his eyes.

"Don't worry about it, I knew you wouldn't really kill him" Luffy replied laughing.

"It's not that. I'm sorry for not being there. When I was mucking around with those shitty Okamas you were fighting a battle on your own. You broke into a prison and the headquarters of the Navy to save your brother and you lost him anyway! I wasn't there for you! I didn't even know you were going through all that and when I did find out, you were missing! No one knew wether you were even alive and I was trapped on an island because I was so weak I could even fight off some shitty Okamas." Sanji finished. Suddenly the crew grew sad, they all knew what Sanji meant, they had all gone through similar situations themselves however it was Zoro who spoke out first "Get over yourself cook. You're not the only one Luffy needed. Luffy, we all failed you, when you needed us most we weren't there. I was walking around lost on an island trying to fight off some monkeys when Mihawk showed up telling me that you had just been involved in a war."

"Zoro, Sanji stop. You don't need to apologise, I knew that everybody was trying their hardest to get back together. You guys are what kept me from going insane, I thought of you and I got out of my depression. Plus we're stronger now right? That's what those past two years were for. Something like that is never going to happen again. I promise. Shishishishishi" Luffy said. The crew looked up at him. That was why he was their captain, he knew how to pull them altogether and knew exactly what they needed to hear. Everybody got up and gave Luffy a group hug while cheering.

After a celebration feast (just because they felt like it) Sanji washed the dishes and closed his eyes. He felt like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. The crew knew that he had been an Okama for a while and didn't care and Luffy had forgiven him for not leaving Okama Island straight away.

"Oi cook" A voice interrupted his inner musings.

"What is it Marimo?" Sanji replied.

"Umm do you need help with the dishes?" Zoro asked.

"No, but I've been meaning to ask you a question." Sanji said thinking back to that massive nosebleed Zoro had that had sent him flying into the railing of the Thousand Sunny.

"Shoot" Zoro said.

"What the hell was that reaction to my horrible wanted poster!?" Sanji shouted. He then proceeded by running up to Zoro and kicking him in the face.

"Yeah about that…" Zoro gasped before adding "Why should I have to explain! You're the pervert of the crew!"

…..

_A.N: To continue or not to continue? That is for you, the reader to decide. I tried to be funny but this is my first fanfic so if you have any advice please let me know :D Please comment. I wouldn't mind keeping it as a one-shot but the need for some more Zosan action is killing but that might just be me so PLEASE GIVE ME FEEDBACK. hehehe_


	2. Chapter 2

_I don't own One Piece. Thankyou everybody for your kind reviews!_ :`)

"What the hell was that reaction to my horrible wanted poster!?" Sanji shouted before proceeding to kick Zoro in the face.

"Yeah about that…" Zoro gasped. How was he going to explain his reaction to Sanji? Zoro had come here to talk but he hadn't really thought about what he was going to say. Should he just jump and say 'Your wanted poster caught me off guard and turned me into a pervert'? Zoro was finding it hard to think with Sanji's foot in his face. Zoro had never lost control of himself before, he had even made fun of Sanji for having so many nosebleeds before hand… wait Sanji was a bigger pervert then he was! "Why should I have to explain? You're the pervert of the crew!"

…..

_Earlier that day…_

The sun shone and a calm sea breeze pushed the sunny forward through the New World. Zoro lifted his giant weight for the 800th time in a row. A single bead of sweat formed at the back of his shoulder blade and ran down his muscular back. The Straw Hats had just battled a bunch of marines but Zoro was feeling unsatisfied. The marines had been hiding behind their captain who Luffy had easily taken out and once he was gone they were hopeless. Zoro had expected the marines of the New World to be a little more fun then those ones had been. Due to the lack of a challenge the marines had presented Zoro had to keep training, to become the best he had to keep pushing himself. He closed his eyes and kept lifting, nothing could stop him. Zoro would definitely be the best-

"Ahhhhhhhh Usopp you were lying about that!?" Chopper's shout broke Zoro's concentration. Luffy, Chopper and Usopp rolled around the green grass on deck laughing. Weren't they meant to be fishing? Zoro rolled his eyes, there were some people who could stop him, he wasn't sure when but at some point on his journey his captain's ambitions and the crew had become more important to him then his own dreams. This was why he trained, to become the best to honour his promise with Kuina but to also support the man who was going to become the pirate king. Zoro shuddered as he thought back to Thriller Bark. He had been so weak back then, the crew had been knocked out and Luffy was long past his limit. Back then Zoro had been ready to give up his life for the crew. He had even resorted to knocking that swirly cook out. Sanji had tried to take his place and had spouted some nonsense about the crew finding a new cook. There was no way the crew would ever replace Sanji. They couldn't, Sanji was Sanji. He was strong, was able to keep up with the crew's appetite and was a loyal nakama. Sanji was amazing… when he wasn't fussing over anything that wore a skirt. What was Zoro thinking!? Zoro closed his eyes and continued lifting his weight. He couldn't afford to get distracted, especially not by Sanji. Sanji was the closest thing to a rival he had on this crew, there was no way he could ever allow himself to get one-upped by that dartboard brow.

In an attempt to put his mind at ease Zoro decided to list facts about Sanji. Hopefully this would get him to stop thinking about the swirly bastard. 1. Sanji was a man. 2. Sanji liked women. 3. Sanji was strong. Zoro had a hard time telling himself this fact but it was true. Whenever Zoro felt like he was getting stronger Sanji easily caught up to him. Zoro admired the dumb ass, not that he would ever tell him. 4. Sanji was also a great cook. Zoro had always liked Sanji's cooking but he had noticed a change in Sanji's skill since the crew got back together. Sanji's cooking was now amazing. The taste had gone up a notch but now after eating Sanji's food Zoro felt his energy levels rising. He didn't say anything though; the love cook already had too big an ego. He had even learnt how to fly these past two years. Attention seeking love cook. Even when the crew first got back together Sanji had lost so much blood that Chopper had to look after him. Zoro would never be as weak as to let his body take over like that. No matter how beautiful a woman is, you never need to get that excited. Thoughts like that only got in the way of becoming stronger. Such desires were what he tried to separate himself from. Only Sanji would have a reaction that big to Nami and Robin, they were crew members for crying out loud! The cook had to know that relationships with crew members were a bad idea, so why did he still get excited when seeing them? Zoro sighed, why was he letting the cook get to him? The crew was full of perverts; they had a walking, talking skeleton musician who liked panties and a cyborg that walked around in speedos! All the males in the crew except for him had gone over to peek in the women's bath in Alabasta. Why did it bother him so much when Sanji acted that way towards the women in the crew?

Zoro snapped out of his musings when he saw a large cloud in the distance. Shit, he was meant to be on watch wasn't he? He looked down at the deck but Nami was there, with a smile on her face and sunbathing. If Nami wasn't concerned about the weather then he shouldn't be either. After watching the love cook hand Robin a drink Zoro decided it was a good time to check that cloud out again but the scene outside the crow's nest was not what Zoro expected to see. Between the Thousand Sunny and the cloud was something that was not meant to be there. A ship!? Was Zoro really so distracted by Sanji's long powerful legs that he had let a ship get close to them!? Long powerful legs!? Zoro then decided it would be a good idea to let the crew know about the ship that was coming towards them.

…..

Sanji had been acting weird. Zoro had never seen him scared of anybody before. Sanji had tried to run away from the ship but when he realised that Luffy would never let him leave he decided to hide in the kitchen. Zoro glared at the source of Sanji's distress. Zoro didn't like this guy. This cross dresser just barged onto the ship and started questioning him like he owned the place. He couldn't chop him up though, Luffy always made friends with the weird ones. The weirdo was now going on about getting Sanji a present.

"When he first arrived I'm told he fitted in perfectly with the other Okamas, after a bit of persuasion that is-" The image of Sanji fitting in with Okamas filled Zoro's mind. No wonder Sanji was hiding. Zoro couldn't help but smirk at the cook's bad luck.

"-but when I arrived all he wanted was to get off the island. He insisted that he was part of your crew but only admitted to his wanted poster after coughing up blood. Of course he calmed down after he got some sort of message in the newspaper and he agreed to stick around for two years so he could get stronger but I've never forgotten the look on his face when he admitted his wanted poster. That is why the others and I decided to take a picture of him in action and send it to the marines so they could update his wanted poster." The weird cross dresser finished. Zoro grinned. Suddenly this guy didn't seem so bad.

"Sanji would really appreciate that. That's an amazing idea" Usopp said. Zoro couldn't help but nod. He was happy for Sanji, even though it would mean that there would be one less thing that Zoro could make fun at him about. Ivankov then continued to talk about how he did it and raised a rolled up poster in front of the crew. Zoro wasn't listening any more though; he was distracted because the scaredy cook had just emerged from his kitchen.

"Oi! Give it here you tranny king." Sanji said running over to Ivankov.

"Ah so you came out Mr. Nosebleed." New wanted poster or not, Zoro could still make fun of Sanji because of his reactions to women and this new info about Sanji being with Okamas.

"What did you say Marimo?" Sanji replied while turning around to kick Zoro. Zoro attacked back, he felt alive when he was picking fights with Sanji. He loved being around Sanji and knowing that he could get under the cook's skin so easily… No! He was thinking these weird thoughts again! What was with him?

"So is that Sanji-boy's boyfriend? No wonder Sanji was so guarded back at Okama Island. He could have told us that he was already taken." The statement was so inline to what he had just been thinking that Zoro couldn't help but turn around and defend them.

"No! Where did you get that idea!? Zoro retaliated. This was bad. He was being obvious and he didn't like the looks the rest of the crew were giving Ivankov. They looked like they had just found a mountain of treasure. Was it just him or had Nami's eyes turned to Beli signs for a split second?

"Well anyway here's the poster!" Ivankov said. Zoro looked up as Ivankov revealed the poster. It was not what Zoro had expected. Had the Okamas really forced Sanji to wear a DRESS!? He felt a bit sorry for Sanji. That guy had really weird ideas of chivalry in his mind and he doubted that he included wearing a dress as one of those. Suddenly the image of him pinning Sanji against the wall while the cook wore the dress filled his mind. He didn't like cross dressers but if Sanji wasn't wearing any pants that would make taking his clothes off him really easy. He kept on imagining the scene until his head hit the Sunny's railing. 'What the hell?' Zoro thought. He looked to see all his crew mates staring at him. He then noticed the trail of blood that started from where he was previously standing and ended at his nose. Embarrassment washed over Zoro and his cheeks heated up. "Oh shit" he muttered.

…..

_Back to the present…_

"It doesn't matter if I'm a pervert!" Sanji stammered. His face had gone red. "You definitely acted like a pervert. Are you saying you're becoming a pervert but why to my poster!? I want you to explain Zoro."

"Tch. I was just caught off guard. I never thought you would try something like that." Zoro grumbled.

Sanji looked at Zoro before his eyes turned into flames. "You think I dressed up as an Okama just to catch you off guard?!"

"I don't believe that you were weak enough to get caught by them and forced into a dress." Zoro said. He needed to distract Sanji. If Sanji kept questioning him and getting closer to him he might just rip his clothes off- That was a weird thought, Zoro decided not to think that again.

"Well, I was. You heard the apology I made to Luffy. I thought you understood where I was coming from." Sanji said. Zoro was stunned silent. The dramatic sissy pervert show off love cook was admitting that he had a weakness. He knew that Sanji had just apologised to Luffy in front of the crew but he had figured that Sanji would continue the never ending battle he had with him. It had been like that since the cook had joined the crew. Every time Zoro said something Sanji would make a remark and Zoro had found himself stirring the cook up more and more. It was a silly rivalry but Zoro thought it was important, plus it was fun to get on the cook's nerves.

Zoro had never really thought about getting into a relationship before. Relationships were the last thing he worried about and he had always left that kind of thing to fate. What was fate trying to tell him here? Was Zoro meant to say something and possibly ruin his entire friendship, wait that's not right, entire whatever relationship he had with Sanji on such a whim? Should Zoro speak out or just let whatever happens happen. Zoro huffed in irritation earning a raised eyebrow from Sanji. All this thinking was getting him no where.

The only warning that Zoro and Sanji got for what happened next was Usopp shouting "Smoke Star!" Zoro and Sanji looked towards where the voice was but it was too late, the entire kitchen had gone white and smoke blocked their vision. What the hell was Usopp thinking!? Didn't he know that they had observation Haki now? He should've learnt something about it when he was fighting those skypieans who called it 'mantra'. Even if you take away a Haki user's vision they can still sense you.

Zoro turned to face Sanji. The smoke was starting to disappear, what was the point of that? He would have to question Usopp about that later. He looked at Sanji but was distracted by a pale expanse of skin showing where Sanji's shirt opened. He then realised Sanji's jacket and tie were missing. Then Zoro looked down at himself and realised that he wasn't wearing a top. His coat was missing! When had that happened? It must've been Nami, the witch! Was she so good at stealing that Zoro hadn't even sensed her taking his coat off? Zoro frowned as he remembered the look those two had given Ivankov when he had asked if Zoro was Sanji's boyfriend. Were Nami and Usopp hinting at what he thought they were hinting? They were going to pay for this.

"Usopp what the hell was that?" Sanji shouted heading for the door but stopped when he noticed Zoro's exposed chest. He then realised his jacket was missing and frowned towards the door.

"Don't get your panties in a twist love cook. It seems your precious Nami-swan was involved in this as well and you would never harm her." Zoro said.

"What do you mean? Why would Nami-san steal my jacket?" Sanji asked, truly perplexed.

"My guess is that she has some sick perverted fantasy about you and I and she somehow forced Usopp into it. That or she just wants to annoy me and then possibly blackmail me." Zoro replied but he had lost Sanji at 'fantasy about you'. The cook was currently on all fours coughing up smoke in the shape of hearts.

"This is why we don't get along" Zoro muttered. He then turned away. The swirly cook would be too busy in his daydream about Nami loving him for him to have heard what Zoro had just said. The smell of nicotine filled Zoro's nostrils and he was suddenly disgusted by it. He wanted nothing more then to leave the kitchen and get away from Sanji.

"What's with that look marimo, since when do you care about how I treat Nami?" Sanji said shocking Zoro enough to get him to face Sanji again. That's the question that Zoro had been asking himself.

"I don't know why I care or when I stared caring." Zoro murmured mostly to himself but his voice was loud enough for Sanji to hear. "Maybe I'm jealous. I have to train myself harder. I need to get in control of my emotions.

"Oi, oi. You shouldn't be shutting away your emotions. That's not healthy." Sanji said, he wasn't sure what Zoro was going on about but he wanted him to be free to express his feelings.

"You don't get it. You always fuss over women and that's fine but I don't really care who it is. If you feel something, you fell something and I think I feel something for a man." Zoro said, he hadn't planned on bursting that out and when he realised what he just said he blushed.

"You're so cute." Sanji said after a moment's silence.

"Yeah well you're… wait what!?" Zoro replied. He had been planning comebacks in his head but for the second time that day Sanji had left him stunned. What was going on here?

"Well I think I'll take you up on your offer. You can do the dishes; I'm going to bed now. See you later Marimo-kun! Oh and don't get lost on the ship again." Sanji said while walking off. Zoro just stood there. Was Sanji running away or was he really not concerned about what he had just said? Zoro sighed and put his hands on the counter top. What was wrong with him? Since when could Sanji leave him so messed up? He was letting the bastard get into his head. Zoro jumped when arms suddenly appeared around him. When had the bastard snuck up on him?

"Oi. I thought you were going to bed." Zoro said trying to act like the cook hadn't startled him.

"I couldn't leave you, you just looked so confused." Sanji murmured before placing a kiss onto the back of Zoro's neck and resting his head on Zoro's shoulder. "I thought I would give you a goodbye kiss to help think things through. Goodnight." Once again Sanji walked away and this time Zoro didn't take his eyes of him until he was out the door. What the hell? Sanji had left Zoro feeling even more messed up than before. Zoro shivered as he remembered Sanji's arms around him. That moron was definitely up to something and Zoro silently vowed to not let the bastard take control of situations like that ever again. After finishing the dishes and beating Usopp up, he would form a counter strategy. Sanji should be careful from now on, the cook thought he was in control but he wasn't. Sanji wasn't the only one who had a few tricks up his sleeve.

….

_DOOM (dramatic manga sound effect)_

_A.N: Nooooo! What am I writing? This sounds like it's leading to smut but there is no way I can write that... If somebody wants to write a smutty scene for me to insert in a later chapter feel free to. I'm stuck, a collab with someone who knows what they're talking about would be nice :). This chapter took a lot longer to write then the first one, it just didn't flow right for my liking. It was a fluke the first chapter went so well but I answered why Zoro had a nosebleed so goodbye! Hahaha *runs out of room* Am I banned of the internet yet? P.S please review :) and sorry for being such a suckish writer._


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